Friday, September 7, 2012

I choose not to accept it

If you've been online, watched television, or listened to the radio in the past month, you've probably heard about the rape discussions by politicians, the infidelity of Kristen Stewart, the breastfeeding photo on Time Magazine's cover, and the healthcare reform debates over women's reproductive choices. What do these issues all have in common? Women's sexual health.
From a recent article on Huffingtonpost.com regarding Kristen and Robert's split, I want to echo this: "For any girl growing up who pays attention to the media, it's a terrifying time to understand what it means to be a girl in society." Terrifying.
The article is written by a man, Nico Lang, and paraphrases quotes from famous male personas in the media who have all contributed their two cents regarding women's sexual health, and it got me wondering: Where are the women? The author dubs this year of filthy media as a "war on women" and I found myself asking how I was going to fight it, then asking... ARE women even going to fight? Are we going to DO anything about it? Why aren't we speaking up for ourselves? Many women in the public sphere are not doing much to lend momentum to the women's movement started decades ago. In fact, some of them are downright taking us backwards! We've got famous females like Rihanna returning to their abuser and conservative Sarah Palin running for political offices to represent us. Where are the culturally intelligent, well-respected, and confident women with integrity? Where are society's women that represent me, my sisters, my cousin who started her own law firm, my co-captain from college ultimate who has worked on carbon reducing projects, and so many other incredible women in my life?
We're working hard in the communities we live in. We're right here, and here, and here. We just need to stand up and represent ourselves. How?
By choosing to not care about the trivial relationship status of two young actors which will likely change several times as they explore their early 20's. By not embracing a culture of sexualizing women. By breastfeeding normally, and maybe even in public, so people understand that boobs serve a purpose and it's not a sexual one. By challenging the balance in media attention - when men are caught cheating or sleeping around, they're applauded, but women are bullied and harassed to the point where their careers may be over. (If you haven't read the article I mentioned above about Kristen Stewart, please do so.)
We can choose to raise our daughters with healthier perspectives. Rather than focusing on how cute, how pretty, our little girls are, we could focus on how good they are at writing or drawing or playing soccer. We can encourage our young women to treat others with respect, to treat themselves with respect, and to demand that others treat them with respect. We can encourage sexual health education so women understand their bodies and their choices. The biggest thing we can all do, I think, is to simply choose not to accept that this is the way our culture is.

2 comments:

  1. Hey Paula, I have a client who belongs to the League of Women Voters. I asked her last week to send me the schedule of events because I want to join. Maybe you would be interested in joining with me? I can send you the info once I receive it. I implore other women to join as well.
    You are spot on that we are here! I have to believe that it's not that us intelligent women aren't out there, I think it's because of our intelligence that we choose to work with the system and rather than "fight against" something we take a positive approach to be pro women and make the needed changes in the little every day things. It reminds me of something Ekhart Tolle said... (and I'm paraphrasing) Things are getting better just at the same rate that they are getting worse. It just seems that things are getting worse because the negative is so much louder than the positive.
    You are a beautifully intelligent woman and I'm proud to have you in my corner:)

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  2. Monica, I would love it if you'd pass on the information to me from the League of Women Voters. I also intentionally wrote this post without saying, "We need to stand up and fight!" but rather asking HOW we were going to stand up. I'm with you on the note of approaching this from a proactive, positive position. And I know how loud you and I can be, so let's drown out the negative Nancy's. :P

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